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Pregnant and very, very desperate

Hello,

I am pregnant (6 months) and things really spiraled out of control in the second trimester for me.
I have been through a hell the last month, month a half. In the beginning of my pregnancy I had a lot of stress because how i got pregnant (very difficult situation), but it resolved more or less and I was feeling worried and anxious but I could manage. My pregnancy triggered my healthy anxiety and hypochondria, which I have had very badly in the past and had to be hospitalized for it. However, the last couple of years things were going better and it even disappeared for a long time. But pregnancy triggered it again. However, it was still within reason.

I took a medication in the 5th month and then things started to go out of control. Because I had a bad reaction towards the medication. I started to get nerve pain and muscles spasms/cramps and tremors over my whole body. I also had severe muscle weakness, could not stand on my legs. Having such fear of illness, I could not handle it and was so angry at myself for taking it. Afraid that I had harmed my fetus and unable to cope with the regret I tried to commit suicide. My mother rescued me and took care of me and I started to recover and was feeling well emotionally. However, my father had a lot of anger inside towards me and just when I as recovering and feeling better lashed out at me big time. He said very, very mean things and was very aggressive. I tried my best to stay upright, but I could not sleep anymore and my body was so weak and my mind started to follow.
I went back to my apartment to avoid my father. And that a month of real hell started.Severe mood swings, feeling of going completely crazy, weak body, weird body sensations, ... one minute hopeful, the next complete despair. I started to pray a lot to God to help me, but I did not help. I started to fear the devil.Feel its presence. Wanted to kill myself frequently. Started to be afraid of foods and have bad reactions to food/fear of illness...Got into rages against my mother besides really not wanting to. Just really scary, complete out of control. No control over my body or mind. It was so scary. Just losing my mind completely and I just could not shift it around.
I started to recover suddenly feeling well again-by using the healing code (a book) and maybe also vitamin d and magnesium (i dunno).I just suddenly made a recovery. Tired, but better and better emotionally. Not ideal, but much better. It was livable.

But I had met a guy, before I got into hell and he wanted to see me. So now that I was better emotionally I met up with him. However, this triggered me again because it made me so very obsessive and longing and insecure. I started to sleep very little again checking me cellphone constantly/fantasing, and now I back in the negative spiral. I was not ready to have a date, however I was obviously longing for someone. I started to feel suicidal again.
I cannot take it anymore, just want to feel better. I need to be ready for the baby. My skin looks very bad with red rash on my face. everybody comments that I look so pale. Normally I look really healthy.
It is just too much for me the situation and my weak body.
I went to a homeopath I subscribed staphysagria 200k 3xday for 3 days. However, I feel worse taking it. Want to look for my own remedy because I need a cure quickly. I cannot spiral back into hell. I want to prepare myself for the baby, but I need a strong body and strong mind to overcome the stressors and prepare myself practically. However, I am unable to come out of this although I really want too. The things that helped me the first time are not helping anymore. I need sleep!!! I cannot sleep. I need sleep to recover. I cannot take sleep medication says my gynecologist. He says medication is worse for the fetus that me not sleeping. However, not sleeping is make me very ill mentally.

Sorry for the emotional post. I want to find my own cure, because N need fast cure and also I don't have so much money.
What are some good homeopathic cures when you are completely desperate, with no control, severe mood swings, very suicidal while pregnant triggered by a anxious personality and severe life stressors

Just want to get better so I can a good mother.
 
  Abou on 2019-12-27
This is just a forum. Assume posts are not from medical professionals.
Try cocculus 30c three times a day for 3 - 4 days.
1 dose is 2 pills.
 
Tui 3 months ago
Thank you for the reply.

Staphysagria is making me very angry. However, it is also calming me with the other symptoms. It aggravates my anger, but lessens other problems. I will remember your suggestion when things get very bad again, and I am losing my mind again.

I have been reading and I am really a sulphur personality most of the time. I really recognize myself in it. It is my normal constitution. Not solely of course. Although I really don't smell bad. And they say sulphur personalities smell bad. But the other things I have normally very badly. Inability to do anything. House chores, personal hygiene, pratical things, coach potato who is always thinking about religious and philosophical things, can be very self-involved, ... I think sulphur would also be a very good thing for me to take, because my laziness and occupation in my mind with philosophical thinking is really impairing my ability to function. Because I just sit and think all day...
If I would like to try, which dose would I have to start with?
 
Abou 2 months ago
You can start from taking sulphur 30c three times a day for a few days and see how you feel after that. If it doesn’t work, try 200c one dose a day for 2 - 3 days before changing it to something else.
 
Tui 2 months ago

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