Need Help

I’m looking for a remedy for my partner who is displaying some narcissistic behaviors and aggression

He was neglected and abused as a small child. He is of Hispanic descent, his mother sent him to live with his father when he was young. His father was very cruel and abusive. He strived to be perfect, make good grades and was a star athlete in any sport he was in. He was in a gang ridden area in California and had to be hard all the time, he still feels like emotions make him weak, he has to be hard or he can be killed or views as weak. He has trouble connecting with emotions, instead of talking about things he gets angry, he seeks to maintain control. Things have to go how he thinks they should go or he responds with anger. (Even something as small as a light being left on… his father would beat him for leaving lights on) He has issues with alcohol, which makes anger worse. Feels he has to protect what’s his. Can’t trust anyone, everyone is looking out for themselves. Pushes around and punches walls when under influence of alcohol. Lacking self confidence. Seeks validation. Thinks he doesn’t deserve love, but wants it. Fears being alone. Wants things that show status. Very self destructive. When he’s not in self destruct mode he’s very charismatic and charming. His employers give him high praise, which he loves. Loves to be noticed and appreciated. Has frequent back pain. Suffers headaches. Partially deaf in right ear. Meningitis when he was a baby. Almost died.