Advice for my 9yr old autistic son

Some info:
My amrriage was a 'rocky-road'. and have been divorced for about 6 years now. it was not a happy marriage--controlling, abusive ex-husband, whose family were also offensive/unbearable. I was actually afraid of giving birth, as I felt I had greater control over my children in the womb and no-one could touch them. Due to my ex-husband and his family.
-G has a sister who is 14ths older and 'mainstream'.
-was in a car accident when pregant with G, which was uneventful
-normal birth/delivary
-started to actually 'laugh' or giggle about 2 hrs after birth.
-always a happy/giggly baby.
-after 18mth vaccinations, stopped saying single words and seemed to regress.
-had a somewhat 'large' head circumference as a baby
-post 18th vacc'n, became quiet and withdrawn, just smiled a lot and played on his own, away from the other kids/sister. Prior to 18th vacc'n had good eye contact, but later did not seem to look into eyes anymore.
-has a large birth mark over the back of his Left leg half way up from ankle to calf, which is extremely dark and which he is very subconscious about--embarassed to wear shorts and always wants to wear pants/socks. has a few smaller more paler birth marks on belly and many moles on back. Blonde haired and blue eyed. Also has a few spider veins over his back down neck and near shoulder blades.
-starting to be toilet trained from 4 years old. Although toilet trained now, is 'AFRAID' to go to bathroom by himself and sometimes afraid of 'sitting on toilet' by himself...says that he is scared!!!
-walked on his toes for a while.
-was quiet as a child/introvert.
-extreme fear of birds
-extreme fear of being alone
-cannot be left anywhere alone, not even at home ina room etc!!!
-is so fearful of being left alone, that often is afraid to go to sleep and will often frighten his sister as he will often go into her bed.
-has dialogue to himself and whispers to himself often
-cannot be criticized/questioned
-he is in a good mood as long as he is not told to do something else, eg homework.
often a 'clown'. Throws himself around;very froward with strngers; boisterous, attrcts unwanted attention in public;screams if asked to do unfavourable things; can lash out by hitting (but not regularly), may also throw things in rage, if he is bothered.
-loves music, books, certain cartoons.
At the moment, runs around with much energy (up and down, up and down--skips a lot). Will often cover his ears, especially his Right ear when afraid and make a 'hissing' sound (like a whisper).
-delayed in mental abilities. Is in the mild intellectual disability range. Sometimes will answer completely different to what he is being asked.
-feel off bed once as an infant and hit his head, which was uneventful (although checked at hospital)
-has had frequently inflammed prepuce
-always touches penis/rubs it, especially when in distress or nervous.
-very flatualent
-left handed
-will say comments over and over and over again...get the answer to some questions and then ask again and again.
-bites his nails, but doesnt want his toe nails cut.
-speaks 'loud' and doesnt care if we are in a quiet place
-may be sitting, but fidgets. Needs to be looking at a book, draing/writing/playing music/turing pages of a book etc etc all the while whilst talking to himself.
-doesnt want unknown children coming to our home. Will point to strangers and ask me...'are they coming to our home?''I don't want them to come.', even though we don't even know them???
-has had at times inflammed, irritaed/red anal area, and would always try to wipe it with tissue etc.
-keep saying 'stop looking at me;just want to be by myself' even though doesnt want to be left alone. Same with homework, always says...'I'll do it myself', even though sometimes, he gets it all wrong, becuase he doesnt read the question and does what 'he thinks' it may be asking.
-speaks in words I donot understand, as though in another language.
-likes to tickle you after you start laughing.
Hope this helps.

Thank you for your reply.
I should mention other traits of G. Had 'yeasty' problems, eg itchy/peeling underfeet, which have resolved since commencing homeopathy.
Disobedient/obstinate/argumentative. Had some biomedical which I feel made him hyperactive etc, but I have since stopped when starting homeopathy last year.
1st remedy:
Hyosc 30C (5 percussions, 5 drops in 1/4 cup water)--very errratic behaviour. Intially, I thought there was some improvemnt, but with subsequent doses, he became violent/irrational etc Obstinate, like he was literally going crazy.
2. Phosphorous--5 percussions, 5 drops into 1/4 cup water. Again, erratic uncontrollable behaviour.
3. Tuberculinum 30C--
had the most dramatic effect of the 1st three remedies, but then had the worst 'side-effects'.
4. Lyocopodium 30c 5 percussions, 5 drops into 1/4 cup water. Initially good, from that evening, but after deteriorating and needing subsequent doses, was worse than the beginning.
5. I then thought there were similar traits to medorrhinum. The homeopath, felt that Lyco was the one, but still she let me try the medorr 30C, which I must admit was going well for a short time, but like before, when he needed redosing, it's like he was becoming 'overdosed' (in my own terms) to the remedies and his behaviour got worse again. In amongst all this, I was advised to do 1 percussion, 1 drop into 1 cup water. Because she thought he was very sensitive to dosing as some children can be. She then dispensed Lyc 200C 1 percussion into 1 cup water, and not repeated as often. it 'seemed' ok for a little while, but then other weird traits would come out, new ones I hadnt seen before or that the old traits were much more magnified.
Then, I forgot about something that had happened. At about 3-3 1/2 years old, G was stung by a bee. The following day, he started to use a few words and have eye contact. His behaviour was 'calm'. At 4 years, or the following year, he was stung by a bee again, the following day, he learnt to do number 2's in the potty. He seemed quite calm for awhile after this. I enmtnioned this actually onMonday. So Apis was prescribed. but at a gentler dose. 1 percvussion, 1 drop into 1/4 cup water. Not as 'erratic'. It is now day 4 since remedy was given. In the back of her mind she is leaning towards phosphorous again as we hadnt tried a 'gentler' dose.
I am meant to report back to her by tomorrow. Yes, I have read about thuja and silica(is that right), but especially thuja for post vaccination problems. At 18ths of age it was the MMR vaccine.
Thank you SO MUCH for replying.

Dear David,
I appreciate your reply.
Yes, the homeopath has been treating G, as things occur, although she did take much of the 'history' down to begin with.
To begin with, I am not sure if many of G's fears are from earlier on. We lived in a home where his father would yell and scream alot, and would not react appropriately to things. G would react by running away (within the home), screaming and holding both ears with his hands. I 'walked' away from this unhealthy marriage. I am not sure if the fears have begun from early childhood.
When I ask G about the bird thing, he says, 'Scared of birds'. I ask him why? or in what way? He doesnt respond/chooses not to/or maybe he can't express fully how he really feels. Often I will see him bend over quickly when he hears or thinks a bird is flying overhead as though he is afraid they are about to run into him as they fly past. So that they will 'miss him', as they they were flying just to either 'attack him' or treat him as 'target practice' or something (well, this is what it 'looks' like to me, and is my interpretation of it). He seems to 'duck: his head and look around after bending his neck a little whenever he hears the bird, as though he needs to hide from them in some way. He will often cover his ears with his hands to avoid hearing them (I think) and by doing the 'hissing' sound, I think whilst closing his ears, it magnifies his sound and therefore making any sound of a bird less obvious. He crouches his body when he does this. The hissing sound is often when he wants to avoid hearing something he doesnt like, like the sound of birds or when his sister is telling me something nasty or upsetting that G did to her. He will often scream also.
At other times when he is afraid, he will grab both his front penile area and his anal area with either hand at the same time, looks like he is holding 'himself' quite firmly. If he is not inside or no-one is within a short distance from himself, he yells out and hastily..'Mum' or his sister's name or his grandma. He will often 'scream' loudly, which I think dulls/drowns other sounds around him. Sort of like his way (I think) of facing his fears???
When G throws himself, he knows where he is landing. The other day, we were coming out of the dentist to the waiting room full of people. We were walking out and then suddenly, and with saying 'whooooooaaa', and rolled down on the ground. EVERYONE was starring!!!! I 'tried' to ignore him (as funny as that may sound lol). He knows exactly what he is doing. Like he doesnt care what people think of him. In that sense he is not really fearful of strangers. He will even say 'hello, how are you?' etc (to the surprise of the stranger), but doesnt want them in our home. He will even go to the extent of pointing to them (while they are watching) and say...'Not coming home???' He is not fearful of pointing at people or that they see him. He doesnt really care about a lot of things. Like if half of his bottom is showing in public, he doesnt care, and I often find myself running after him pulling his pants up or telling him...'Pull up your pants!!!' If he chooses he will ignore me. He doesnt care if he yells in public or if people are staring at him. He even hugged other kids at swimming after his swimming instructor hugged him. The other children were like 'um???what was that about???' lol. He desont care if he has a melt down in quiet places, and to me it often seems like 'on purpose' eg church etc. Although he is very well behaved at school. I remember how quiet and embarrassed he was, when I visited school and spoke to his teacher. He kept hiding behind me. Later he would come and talk to me with the teacher. His teacher said, that this was the most she had heard him speak, becuase he often chooses to be quiet at school. At school he is terrified of the 'naughty coerner' or the 'step chart' whenevr a child is being disobedient. He rwally is fearful of being in trouble and often will say to me, whenever I need to reprimand him...'G is good!!!' 'I am good', 'I am not naughty', 'Not naughty??? Good? Good'' over and over until he is satisfied that he is not being branded as 'naughty'? He will often lie also that he didnt do what his sister said that he 'did' do. To avoid any punishment or that he will for some rerason be branded as naughty!~!!
Often with me, to get attention, he may repeat himself over and over or come really close, grab my chin and force my head to turn towards him. Often he will 'scream' to get attention. Interrupts conversations often, especially if I am talking to someone else. Sometimes I sense some 'jealousy' of his older sister (who is 14mths older). Sometimes it's like he wants to cause trouble or to get a reaction from me. The other day we were at the cinema, and he put his hands high up in the air as though to stretch, and making a big sigh at the same time!!! I told him to piut his hands down as people behind us could not see. He did it more and I could see by the cheeky look on his face, it was on purpose. So I thought, it's better to ignore. If I ignore these behaviours, he seems to stop, but if I object to them, it seems to make him more rebellious!!!
He lashes out often in objection to something, by screaming, or throwing things, sometimes kicking a chair or hitting me or whoever is near by. He used to hit and lash out more, but thank God, it is less since we started homeopathy. But it can still happen. But this behaviour is not on its own accord, it's usually becuase it is in reaction to being told to do something he doesnt want to do, or because he doesnt want to hear someone critisizing him. A good point I should add here---he hates criticism, but is first to point out others' faults.
All this and many more I have also shared with my homeopath, who does ask questions like these. And at that point in time, he seesms to fit that remedy, but for some unknown reason, although it may be a 'good' remedy, the resukts are not what we suspect. Is 30C in any remedy sounding too high for him?
Thank you David, I really appreciate your time. Sorry about the 'long essays'.

Thanks David.
She stopped the lyc 200C.
I think she is seeing with the Apis (probably because I was 'hinting' maybe we should try that one), but I called her yesterday and she told me to give the Apis 30C twice weekly (one percussion, 1 drop in 1/4 glass water). But she indicated she wants to try the phosphorous (at a lower dose). A lot of his symptoms are quite 'laughable' because he is quite out there, and has no care about other people's opinions (only those closer to him----that is that he is a 'good boy'). The fear of birds I have read about once in a lady (via internet). When I was looking further into the Apis remedy (which seems to fit in some ways---the busy bee--constantly moving, constantly doing something, preoccupied, can't keep still etc etc. Will attck if provoked. If you don't bother the bee it won't attack, but like the bee, if my son is 'bothered' he will react/attack etc) So I saw this article. And in it is the example of a woman needing Apis who also shared her fear of birds, of which the Homeopath had never seen before) The link is:

http://www.vithoulkas.com/en/contributions-of-gv/materia-med....

It's interesting you say that it sounds like he needs an animal remedy, because now, he is acting like a dog (or mimicking our dog). Love smelling our hair, and is licking his hands to then wipe on his clothes/shoes/his hair or face etc. When I ask him what does this mean? He says 'like a dog' or 'like 'Truly'' our dog'!!! Funny?!?
So far with the Apis, he has been calmer, not as animated, and has sat by himself outside, whilst we have been inside. The day after taking his first dose, hespoke in carefully thought out words. But he is so against going to sleep. And will be found in his sister's bed in the morning. My daughter says, that although they share the same room and he knows she is in her own bed, he yells out during the night..'Sophia!!!' and she responds...'What?', to which he replies...'Nothing...' Or she finds him stadning in the middle of the room staring at her???
lol....shouldnt laugh, but many things he does make me want to cry....but also laugh at the same time...:)))

One thing I should also add about the 'birds' is that before going outside (especially at home), he looks to see if they are sitting on the fence or in a tree. I am not sure what he is thinking?? Maybe he thinks they are looking him and 'waiting' for him, so they can 'charge at him as soon as he comes out'. He often says to me...'Stop looking at me!!' or 'Stop watching me''...by myself'--even though he doesnt want to be left alone in the room!!!--maybe it's a 'personal space' thing?? Maybe he thinks the birds are 'looking at him'?? Can't explain it.

...also recently, the lyc200C and the stramonium, also have caused a very bad cough. Or it seemed to coincide, as soon as started the remedy these coughs began. Dry, irritating hacking cough. Since starting Apis, this has stopped, and also the regular sneezing (3-5 sneezes in a row) have stopped also. He has had 'hayfever' tendencies on and off also.

Dear David,
I really appreciate your knowledge and experience in the matter. Thank you.
Do you think I should see how the Apis goes for now?

Oh, Ok. Thanks David.