discouraged...sepia?

Hello,

I have been suffering a variety of symptoms i will speak to shortly over some 3 or 4 years now although they have changed much during course of my homepathic treatment. Currently i am wondering whether or not i am experiencing some after effects of having taken sepia for quite some time.

About me:
I am 24, very thin (about 95lbs), a little under 5'4', brunette, brown eyes, medium skin tone. I am a premedical student in my last semester of undergrad, very studious, generally disciplined, fairly passionate, compassionate, at times heavily stressed even when unnecessary. I have had various degrees of anxiety since highschool and both anxiety and depression run in my family. I have suffered some depression myself, the most severe episode starting around march of 06 and lasting until just recently. More to be said on that when i speak of symptoms. I am also very sensitive both emotionally and physically to all sorts of influences. Most of my life i have tended to be more of a cold person...that is i become cold easily.

Current symptoms:
Over the last year i have become somewhat emaciated...i have not lost a huge amount of weight but it is quite noticeable on me as i am fairly thin anyway. Also the weight loss happened at a time when i was eating more than usual. (i have had thyroid checked and its normal...has been normal consistently for 2 years). The shape of my body has changed and looks very odd to me...i lose weight in all areas of body including face and neck except in my stomach where i have gained weight and it is very flabby... sometimes liquidy, hangs over my pants etc. This is quite strange as my whole life i had a very toned and flat stomach. I know it sounds silly but its the fact that i am losing weight in other areas and i just feel 'off'. I feel i look malnourished.

Also i am experiencing extremely intense waves of heat that are generally brought on by emotion...usually negative ones, but can sometimes happen even without an emotion. The heat starts in my lower back and moves in waves up my back and into my head. It can last for hours or minutes. Lately it goes away fairly quickly. I feel humid and moist...sometimes i feel like i am sweating heavily but when i touch the skin is dry. Sometimes after the heat i feel very cold. This heat can occur regardless of how cold it is. The best analogy i can make is the type of heat you feel after coming in from the cold and still have all your outdoor clothes on. I am also suddenly very sensitive to external heat as well...if it is hot at all i am having heat waves and am very uncomfortable...this has never been the case with me as i usually enjoy heat. I started taking nux vomica 30c the end of january...took 4 nights in a row and then once a week since. When i first started taking it i noticed i was actually sweating (underarms mostly) for like a week straight. I also would be sweating on my back at times. (My whole life i have tended to never sweat, even when hot, unless extremely hot of course). another thing i noticed since taking nux is my feet and legs often get cold and i feel like they arent getting proper circulation or something. This is an old symptom of mine that has been gone for more than a year at least.

Starting about 3 months ago i started having severe insomnia. The middle of december it was its worst. It would be physically impossible for me to sleep usually for 48 hours at a time and happening about 4 days/week. During the insomnia i felt mentally tired but my body felt reved up. i was sweating and very hot. I tried coffea 30c which didnt work and then aconite which worked very well. I still have some trouble sleeping about 1/week but i generally will not be up the whole night. Instead it will take me a couple hours to fall asleep. I should mention i have no problem staying asleep once i can actually fall asleep but falling asleep is the problem. I am suddenly very sensitive to noise at night esp. footsteps and voices, including the tv. (i live with 6 other people). During this insomnia i am VERY irritated and anxious, and sometimes quite angry. At its worst it was pure rage that i have no outlet for. I was also very depressed during this time. At the end of december i started taking arsenicum album 30c which gave some relief but then stopped. The mental relief was most prominent. I tried phosphorous but had a very bad effect...become very anxious and the insomnia got worse again.

When i started the ars. i had an almost immediate outbreak of acne that is an old system and this has stayed with me up untill present. Currently i have acne (small pimples mostly. right cheek,forehead and chin.)They take quite a while to heal. oily skin, and dandruff that is also oily. These two symptoms started about 4 years ago when i first started homeopathy. I sought a homeopath because i was having panic attacks daily. He gave me nux vomica which helped immensely but ever since i have had on and off acne problems which started as just a shiny forehead and progressed from there. Before this i never had acne problems or oily skin even as a teenager.

I have had problems with ring worm since was a kid ( maybe around 10 it started) although this went away for sometime and returned several years ago. I have not had any ringworm for several months. I usually get it around my underwear line. As a kid it was usually my knee. It doesnt progress much and goes away on its own. It is not itchy.

Also since i was very young i have had cold urticaria, only as a child it happened only on my face...i would get hives after playing in cold for a while that went away shortly. This went away for about 10 years and came back suddenly when i was 19 or 20...also somewhat soon after i started homeopathy. However i first noticed after swimming which had never happened before. In the past couple months it has gotten much worse. I get it mostly on my legs both upper and lower, and buttox...it is very itchy which is new. The area need not be exposed for a reaction. Strangely the only area that is exposed to the cold air (my face) does not get it anymore. the wheals can get very big. they go away in 15-20 min. Afterwards i sometimes feel light headed and cold. 2 summers ago after being on sepia for the entire summer i went swimming and when getting out got hives everywhere! even on my stomach. I laid in the sun for about 2 hours fully clothed (it was around 80 degrees) and could not get warm. I felt very shaky...i think my blood pressure must have been extrememly low. This does not happen in general just from walking in cold air. Cold wind makes it worse. Also upon reheating my ears and elbows are very itchy. The skin on my elbows is red and dry. Oddly, walking across campus in morning always produces a reaction but the same walk back at night it often doesnt happen.

Currently i would say i am slightly depressed at times but mostly just about my physical symptoms which i cannot get a handle on. I am very embarassed by my appearance because i am extrememly thin and look about 15! Even my 15 year old sister looks older than me. I have very fine features. something about me just does not look right and i dont feel like myself.

All summer long i was losing hair and my eyes looked strange. I am no longer losing hair, and usually my eyes look ok.

As a baby and young child i was severly allergic to milk (lactose intolerant) and would vomit profusely when given dairy. This has gone away. I have been drinking more milk than usual lately (mostly hot chocolate).

I smoked for 5 years as a teen but quit when i was 19.

I dont drink any coffee but used to. I am not doing any caffeine or alcohol past couple months since being on remedies. (I usually like to drink wine with dinner and beers occasionally. I aslo generally drink some coke.)

I have noticed lately that my stool is changed...it is often quite bulky, a bit orange, and much softer than my normal stool. I am not sure whether this is good or bad. its just different. Over the summer i had some episodes of diarrhea but this went away.

I think my mental disposition has gotten much better but i aslo go through stages where i get discouraged because i feel like i am doing everything i should be and not getting well (physically).

I eat very healthy. Also i drink a lot of fruit juices (odwallas) especially the green superfood and carrot juice. The past couple of months i had lost my appetite and sometimes it would be hard to swallow food..i would gag slightly. I would drink a lot while eating. My appetite has returned and i am eating very well but still not gaining weight. I wonder if i maybe have some malabsorption issues?

Sometimes i get extrememly thirsty and can only be relieved by water... no amount of juice helps, in fact the juice makes me thirstier! This thirst happens sometimes with the heat.

I used to be very confident, outgoing, VERY social and loved parties. I am not this way anymore. Although i do still like being with people. I avoid my oldest closest friends because i dont want them to see how i look/am.

About the sepia...i was taking it 2x a day (morning and night) for about 4 months, two summers ago. I am not sure of the dose and will get back to you on that. To be honest i dont remember why i started taking it. It may have been related to skin issues. Anyway that is what the homeopath prescribed. I noticed that after taking it a while i would wake up sweating in the middle of the night. I would throw off covers and get cold soon, cover back up and sleep rest of night. Also while on it i was hungry constantly. I ate and ate and ate, i especially craved bread, but in general any food. I was hungry the second i woke up in the morning which was odd for me as i have never been a morning eater. Anyway that summer i put on about 8 lbs which i was quite pleased about as its usually very hard for me to gain weight. Then i noticed my stomach was getting very large and sometimes looked swollen. Sometimes it felt very stretched and uncomfortable. Then i began losing some of the weight i'd put on except for in the stomach. This made me look quite weird. This has really never gone away. And then of course as mentioned above i have lost about 7-10 pounds from what i normally weigh. Also during the time of taking sepia i was living in france and had a much different diet than i would at home but ate much better and in general preffered this eating to how i eat at home. I also drank a lot of wine/beer during this time. My skin problems got much better at first on sepia but then worse. And this includes the urticaria as mentioned.

That fall (05) after coming home i was depressed and took nat. mur once a week for 6 weeks. It really helped but i felt i should have continued or increased the dose but never did. Since then (starting 06) things went very downhill both mentally and physically. Just recently the mental aspect is much improved.

I feel better after aerobic exercise but dont like to do it too often for fear of losing more weight.

Cold air ameliorates the irritation and heat problems.

My menstrual cycle is mostly regular but i have noticed lately it lingers on and on after the regular 5 or 6 days of flow and is just very dark brown blood that turns into dark brown discharge and finally is gone. Also i usually have some discharge after walking in the cold.

Another thing is for the past couple months i often have very thick mucus in my throat coming from nose that i cant swallow or cough up. I will be swallowing constantly for like an hour and it wont go away. Usually happens in morning after an hour or so of being awake.

I am very intelligent and clear minded. I have trouble making decisions. I am hasty and slightly impatient about my health and maybe move on to new remedies too quickly.

My maternal grandmother had addisons disease and some type of thyroid problem. Cancer runs on my mothers side of the family.

Music can make me cry. I have trouble expressing my feelings about myself but this has gotten somewhat better. I tend to absorb other people's stress, mostly my family's. I have no tendencies to hurt myself or others although i do get very angry at times and will be shaking with anger. In general i love life and wish i could be enjoying mine the way i used to since everything in my life is going quite well besides my physical health. Most of the time i maintain a positive and hopeful attitude.

I would greatly appreciate and advice/suggestions. Sorry this is so long but i wanted to be as thorough as possible. Someone has suggested that i take a few strong doses of sepia and wait from there. I am not sure whether to continue the nux. It has had a positive effect but has stopped changing.